The other day, I was reading about people involved in an intimate relationship. The only thing they included in the article was the term living apart together relationship. How are you going to have a meaningful, intimate relationship but live apart? Just what does this mean?
To begin with, we are going to look at the following:
1. What is the definition?
2. Is the United States the only country this occurs?
3. What are the benefits of living apart together (LAT)?
4. What are the disadvantages of LAT?
What does living apart together mean?
According to Wikipedia, “Couples living apart together (LAT) have an intimate relationship but live at separate addresses. It includes couples who wish to live together but are not yet able to, as well as couples who prefer to (or must) live apart, for various reasons.
Is it only in the United States that LAT occurs?
It is actually pretty commonplace. The thought is that living apart together relationships is it’s a new and better for modern couples to live. I read a few surveys that suggested that around 10% of adults in Western Europe, the US, Canada, New Zealand, and Australia live apart together. In comparison, about a quarter of people in Britain thought of as “single” actually have an intimate partner. They just don’t live together.
What are the benefits of living apart together?
Oh, yes. There are many reasons to live apart together. If you are married or living together and, in a relationship, how many times have you thought that it would be much better if you didn’t live together?
1. Your downtime is your time.
2. Living habits don’t annoy as much.
3. You do have long-distance relationships, but more people are living apart to alleviate the financial stresses that can occur.
According to GoDates, they listed four more benefits for LAT.
4. “Independence is highly valued and compromising this can quickly lead to the end of cohabitating.”
5. Fulfilling sex life – Depending on distance, couples might need to get quite pioneering to show affection. Romantic rendezvous, surprise visits, and get-togethers via phone or video can keep love interesting and allow anticipation to build when you spend time apart.
6. Time together is precious and enjoyable when not assumed or taken for granted.
7. Career, travel, or location preference can mean one partner’s place is more appealing. This can be a fun perk of having separate homes.
Are there disadvantages to living apart together?
I have to admit, there are a few disadvantages. Let’s look.
1. Expense – it can be very expensive to manage two houses with the cost of living the way it is.
2. Trust issues – it is critical that both of you build trust with each other if you are in a relationship, and if that relationship is an LAT, not being faithful can erode trust. Too often, one partner use LAT relationships as an opportunity to start other relationships and cheat on their partners.
3. Viewed as socially unacceptable. The acceptable norm is that real relationships are the ones in which couples share the same home and life goals.
4. You can feel lonely and left out. Spending some alone time is good but being lonely most of the time is not so good.
5. Missing out on shared experiences is no good. There are some treasured moments in everyone’s life that they would want to share with someone very special. Not being able to do so can take you down.
Conclusion
We looked at the following in our article.
1. What is the definition?
2. Is the United States the only country this occurs?
3. What are the benefits of living apart together (LAT)?
4. What are the disadvantages of LAT?
It takes an immense amount of support, trust, and respect to make living apart together work. You and your loved one need to examine whether or not LAT might work for you. What does it mean for you to live ‘Happily Ever After’ means for the two of you?
Contact us if you would like more information on this topic or have requests you would like to see based on what we introduced you to on BVA Relationships welcome page.
